So Goodbye
Year of the Snake and welcome Year of the Horse. In Chinese astrological terms
that is! One of my readers celebrated the outgoing year by finding a snake in
the bathroom!! I’m not making light of it, I’m sure it was a highly traumatizing
episode but I personally would be conscious of not going around to the house
any time around February 19th next year. Well because unexpectedly
finding a horse in your house at all would be bad enough but in your bathroom?
I can hear
you all saying – Wow isn’t the Chinese New Year late next year? Yes it is and
would you like to know why? It’s because we have already been too greedy this
year as far as lunar cycles are concerned! Only the 4th of February
and already had two new moons!! So of course we have to pay it back next year!
Apologies in
advance to my American readership for using, in the next bit. a couple of words
that you are not that familiar with!! However
with that apology you can be safe in knowing that you are in the vast majority –
maybe 99% of Americans that have never ever done this!! Let alone understand
it!! This is how the story goes!
I was on a
bus the other day that went the whole way round a roundabout twice!! That’s
actually the whole story!! Maybe I should add, at once and the same time? Maybe
not? For those familiar with buses and only one bus stop serving both
directions on roundabouts then this is although a little extreme very easy to
get your head round. To those more local that know Clatterbridge hospital
roundabout and the 487 towards Neston and passengers thinking it goes in to the
hospital when it is three quarters of the way round the afore mentioned
roundabout then this is so understandable you could probably go on to the next
bit already!!
I had
thought of over complicating that story with the fact that there is a petrol
station in the centre of this roundabout too but thought for the sake of the
red squiggly lines from spell checker (US) under all the words, I wouldn’t!
I love
learning things and if I learn something every day – no matter what it is then
that’s me one happy bunny!!
My learning
experience yesterday is still rattling round in my mind! Thank you to a couple
of readers and Tesco for this gem. At a self service check out at the above
mentioned grocer there were two products being purchased. A clipper lighter,
with a handle that you would use maybe for lighting a cooker or a boiler and a
pack of 4 forks, just ordinary forks, without their knife partners. Forgetting
that when purchasing lighters, alcohol, some meds and adhesives you have to have
your age verified before you can continue, the assistant had to come to the
check out and log in. “Sorry mate I forgot I was buying a lighter!” Can you
imagine the shock when on the screen it said, AGE VERIFIED for product PACK OF
FORKS!!
So cutting
to the chase what I learned from this story was that you have to be 25 before
you can stab someone or yourself to death with what are in effect very blunt
forks but you are perfectly free to burn your house or their shop to the ground
at whatever age you happen to be. So please mind yourself while you are eating
and take extra care while you are washing up your cutlery!! As an aside to that story the verdict on the forks was that really they found it difficult tearing the flesh of a sausage let alone 'stabbing' human flesh!!